A few days ago I wrote a post saying I had begun reading He’s Just Not That Into You by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo of Sex and the City. Here’s my update.
I finished the book and found it enlightening. I love common sense wisdom and this page-turner is filled with those kinds of tidbits. So often we sit around dissecting a man’s behavior when all along it’s pretty clear — he’s just not that into us. Case closed.
That said, there is a paragraph at the end that I found highly disturbing. It is part of the banter between the authors, something that happens throughout the book. Greg is very black and white in advocating that women have high expectations from the men they date. Liz intimates in some parts and then flat out says it’s not realistic to do that. This is what she writes:
“… it seems logical, reasonable, and down right savvy for all the fantastic, smart, healthy, funny, kind women out there to start thinking about lowering their expectations. Because I don’t know about you, but I hate being single. I hate going to parties alone. I hate sleeping alone. I hate waking up alone. I hate knowing that every single boring errand I have to do, I’m going to do alone. I hate not having sex. I hate cooking for one and shopping for one. I hate going to weddings. I hate people asking me why I’m still single. I hate people not asking me why I’m still single. I hate my birthday because I’m still single. I hate having to think about possibly becoming a single mother because I’m single. Have I made myself clear?”
Oh, yes. Very clear. That’s SAD!!!!! Is that really how you feel? Everything you do is meaningless because you’re single? Your life will begin when and if you get married? How warped are we as a society for perpetuating this mindset? Because make no mistake about it, we do perpetuate it.
Liz, please, give me a call for some life coaching. Let’s see if we can’t shift your thinking. A man will not fix what’s ailing you. Only you can.
Have I made myself clear?