I am at that place in online dating. I’ll call it Weird Place. I correspond with a guy who seems OK, but I just don’t find him engaging for whatever reason. But maybe in person he’s great, I think.
So I keep up the correspondence and each response makes me more certain that we’re not a good match. It’s not really tangible. It’s a vibe.
It would be awfully rude to just disentangle now. Or would it? The critic voices in my head say, “How will you know if you don’t meet him?” Or, “You’re a horrible human being if you don’t meet him.” Or, “How shallow can you be?”
The realist in me counters with, “Why waste your time or his?” Or, “You’re doing him a favor if this is how you feel.” Or, “Why is it shallow to follow your gut? You’re not basing this on materialism or looks. That would be shallow!”
So it’ll be a phone conversation. That should provide more information, more of a gauge.
I don’t like residing in Weird Place. I need out.
having done my fair share of internet dating [side note: i met the man i now live with almsot 3 years ago on the web….overall, i’d say it’s a numbers game more than anything else], you *know* when it’s not right. go with your gut. if an evening of strained conversation isn’t going to benefit you, bag it.
rock on, nancy!
Thanks, Ali! I took your advice.