Sass
I have a male friend who recently called me Alexis Colby. He has, at times, called me Bette Davis. He says it as a compliment, usually with unabashed affection and a big, fat smile. I eat it up most of the time.
Every once in a while, though, it gives me pause. Ten years ago, a woman I worked with at The Trenton Times once told me that because I always said she was a riot, she felt obligated to be funny around me all the time. I don’t think I fully understood that back then, but I do now.
I’m not always tough and sassy. I can be. Sometimes I like to be. I have a female friend who is also an independent sort. She has a strong male energy. No doubt about it, we can be “broads” with the best of ‘em. People often love that we seem fearless and have a biting wit.
But here’s the rub. Sometimes we’re none of the above. What then?
Suburban escape
I went to visit my sister today. A nice train ride away to suburbia. Got to spend time with my almost 2-year-old niece.
While little Gina napped and stayed with her dad in the late afternoon, my sister and I went to the new Barnes and Noble near her home. It was heavenly. We collected a stack of books and sat on easy chairs reading.
The highlights of my reading, discoveries if you will:
The effect of any writing on the public mind is mathematically measurable by its depth of thought. How much water does it draw? If it awaken you to think, if it lift you from your feet with the great voice of eloquence, then the effect is to be wide, slow, permanent, over the minds of men; if the pages instruct you not, they will die like flies in the hour. – Ralph Waldo Emerson
How happy is the little Stone
That rambles in the Road alone,
And doesn’t care about Careers
And Exigencies never fears –
Whose Coat of elemental Brown
A passing Universe put on,
And independent as the Sun
Associates or glows alone,
Fulfilling absolute Decree
In casual simplicity –
– Emily Dickinson
I also had some fun with a Dream Dictionary and a neat little horoscope book. Leafed through Vogue on the train ride home.
A good day all around.
A new level
I’m raising a metaphorical glass to new friendships, new clients, new possibilities. New beginnings. A new way of looking at things. Renewal.
New, new, new, new new.
Cheers.
Big things
Went to meet a new (!) life coaching client at the Hyatt Regency near Grand Central Station tonight. Had to convince myself it was safe, as the recent events in London have me a little cautious and even skittish.
Anyway, what a wonderful session! This job is so invigorating sometimes. There’s such a crackly energy in a good session and it makes me come away as inspired as the client. I’m excited about my ongoing work with her.
I decided to walk back to the PATH station afterwards. As I headed south down Fifth Ave. and crossed 38th St., I looked up at the Empire State Building. Oh my God. I’ve seen that landmark so many times but sometimes it takes my breath away. It was lit in all red tonight. Standing just four blocks away I was awed by its enormity.
That’s all.
Coaching lesson
I was explaining life coaching to someone today. He was intrigued, had never heard of it before. Was trying to grasp the value I give to my clients. His eyes widened at the fees I earn.
“What if they don’t achieve the goals they set?” he asked.
“It’s completely up to them,” I said.
“You have no responsibility?” he replied with a laugh.
“Well, most people know what they have to do to achieve their goals. They hire me because they want to be accountable to someone,” I explained.
He was amused, maybe skeptical. I should have likened it to a personal trainer. That’s a more common profession, so people grasp the concept better. Most people know what they need to do to be healthy and fit. They hire a trainer to keep them honest.
I love that about coaching. It allows me to see accomplishments, shifts, insights in my clients. They often form better habits, learn the value of baby steps. I saw two former clients last weekend and both talked of where the coaching process has put them in terms of their everyday lives and longterm goals.
Ahhhhh …
Three-ring binders
I bought 12 binders at Staples today. The half-inch ones. Six black and six white. I use them to give coaching clients when they sign up with me; I fill them with worksheets and other coaching info.
I call this strategy, “Buy it and they will come.” I’m ready to increase my client base and this just gets the energy rolling in the right direction. Come one, come all. Let me give your life a dramatic lift.
Come on. You know you want to.
The mouse
Lessons from the mouse:
– empowerment
– take back your time
– stop letting fear get in the way of things you want to do
– appreciate with all your heart random acts of kindness
– practice with all your heart random acts of kindness
– take help from others with grace
– people have an immense capacity to surprise you, for the better and for the worse
– expand your circle of friends and do a better job of cultivating existing friendships
– open up your world
Prayer to the Universe:
If there are any further lessons to be learned from the mouse, please give me the courage and strength to absorb them in a meaningful way. Give me joy. Give me grace. Be with me as I walk this path. Be with me as my fears dissipate, as I learn to hold true love, true financial prosperity, professional success beyond my wildest dreams. I am willful. I am strong. I will weather this and conquer it. I will not be stopped. It is my time. Thy will be done.
And so it is.
In the moment
The humid weather gave way to glorious sunshine and a cool breeze. I spent the morning enjoying it on a bench at the waterfront, writing, sipping coffee.
The afternoon, well that’s been devoted to work in a cafe via laptop.
Now? Off to the city for strolling and dinner. Thrust back into the postcard weather.
Gotta bask in it while I can.
Feeling
I feel calm.
I feel hyper.
I feel charged.
I feel low-key.
I feel emotional.
I feel even-keeled.
I feel confused.
I feel clear.
I feel loved.
I feel lost.
I feel rich.
I feel deprived.
I feel expressive.
I feel shut down.
I feel dense.
I feel brilliant.
I feel sexy.
I feel fragile.
I feel.
Time matters
I’ve been taking back my time. Something I need to do every so often. No one was taking it from me. Just me taking it from me. And man, am I tough to reckon with.
This week I have spent a lot of time in a cafe, laptop in tow. Mornings, a few evenings. My “bread and butter” job is from 2-7 p.m. every day. That leaves me time for my creative and business pursuits. What was I doing with that time before? Who knows. Who cares. This is partly mouse-inspired empowerment and partly just a long overdue shift.
Then I went into the city and realized I was a half hour early for work. In a conscious attempt to continue savoring my time, I bought the August issue of Vogue and then purchased a Diet Coke from a hot dog vendor. He devoured me with his eyes, asked if I was Italian, told me he was Greek. I smiled and then found a ledge at FIT to sit and sip and browse.
My time. My way. Well, my better way.
